


untitled

by orphan_account



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Derek is offended, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Misunderstanding, Stiles is put up with the pack life, Stiles knows, This is DUMB, Tumblr Prompt, Werewolf Derek, happy endings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-27
Updated: 2015-11-27
Packaged: 2018-05-03 13:45:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5293409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles and Derek are set up on a blind date that goes awry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	untitled

**Author's Note:**

> A quick tumblr prompt.

"What the _hell_ , Jackson?" Stiles hisses to himself after the most gorgeous man Stiles has ever seen sits down in front of him. He has stubble and cheekbones higher than Wiz Khalifa. He wears a leather jacket, which is equally as impractical as it is badass.

"Is there a problem?" Derek asks, frowning. 

"Yes there absolutely is. I _specifically_ told him not to set me up with a werewolf. God damn it."

Derek's eyes go wide, "Wh- I'm not. A werewolf. Why would you even... That's crazy. I'm not... Werewolves are... What?"

"Uh huh, that was about as convincing as me telling you I'm a billionare. Look, dude, sorry, but this can't happen. I have a strict no wolf policy." Stiles waves him off absentmindedly, too frustrated to do anything but sigh and pinch the bridge of his nose. Danny had told him he was getting a _human_. The fuck? How rude, honestly. The nerve. Jackson had offered to do a nice thing, and Stiles thought, hey, wow, maybe he really is turning his attitude around, offering to set Stiles up with a friend on a blind date, but -

He's yanked up by the front of his button up and hauled to the bathroom in three seconds flat. Which isn't that impressive, considering the small size of the coffee shop, but worrisome enough. The bulking stranger clicks the lock and slams him into the back of the door, hard enough to knock the wind out of him

"What the fuck, dude?" Stiles snaps, already irritated and now just livid. Some brute wolf thinks he can just toss him around? 

"How do you know about me?" Derek flashes his eyes briefly and bares his teeth and oh, great, awesome an alpha. Which is made pretty obvious by his monstrous muscles that practically rip the shirt he's in whenever he moves and posture. Even betas hold themselves a little lower. He should've noticed before. 

"Of course you are. I fucking hate Jackson _so_ much. If I survive this, I'm going to hunt down his ass and rip his balls off and then run him over with his stupid porsch."

Derek growls. "I said, how do you know what I am?" 

"Magic."

"Don't get smart with me. I'll rip your throat out. With my teeth." He bares them to punctuate his point. 

Stiles swallows, eyes drawing down to said teeth. They're still human, which is a relief. He's yet to be bitten by an alpha and it sure as hell won't happen now.

" _Magic_ ," Stiles insists. Derek's eyes flick to red and stay there warningly. Stiles sighs, pries Derek's fingers off. "Can't you just listen to my heartbeat? I'm not lying."

Derek tilts a head, listening. "No. It's too quick." 

"Fine, whatever. Dude, I'm magic. Spark. Emissary, if you will. I mean, I'm not really anyone's emissary. I guess I sort of am, but not really. I wouldn't, like, put it on my resume or anything. I mean, obviously not, for, you know, reasons. But I could be technically one. I guess I'm not really like Deaton, but in a sorts, to Scott, I'm a -"

"Did you just say Deaton? Alan Deaton?" Derek narrows his eyes, posture relaxes minutely after Stiles nods. 

"Yeah, rad dude. You know him? Total badass. A little stiff, kind of an asshole, doesn't have a good sense of humor - hey he kinda sounds like you!" the unamused look he gets makes him grin. Derek rolls his eyes.

"Great. Glad this misunderstanding didn't have anymore bodily reprecussions," Stiles mutters. "I'll just be leaving now."

He grabs onto the door handle, but Derek pushes it back closed with a monotonous, "Wait!"

Stiles huffs a sigh and turns. There's no use trying to fight it, because record has shown that when alphas want something, they end up getting it in the end, and most of the time it's better to just cooperate. He has an entire body full of scars to account for that lesson. Stiles indulges with a hand wave that says 'go on, then'.

"Why won't you date a werewolf?" he asks suspiciously, a little touchy. "And how did you know I'm one? I barely sat down before you shouted it out."

"Dude are you kidding? Have you ever _met_ a werewolf? And second, You're obvious. It's winter, and you're wearing a stupid leather jacket on the streets of New York. In the middle of winter. You have this look, like nothing could beat you in a fight. Which, trust me, plenty can. You ever meet a kanima? Your nose was all twitchy when you first came in here. I insisted on meeting in a coffee shop because werewolves can't stand them, say they're loud and smell bad. Besides the point! Do you want me to go on?"

Derek frowns. "I've never had anyone figure it out before."

"You must be surrounded by idiots."

"I feel like it," he mutters lowly, glaring at nothing. 

"Is that all? I have to go chew Jackson out and find a human lover, no offense."

He gets a hand pushes into his chest, making him bump against the door. He glares at Derek, who's just staring, brow furrowed. 

"You never told me why you won't date werewolves. For a spark, you're pretty speciesist."

"Speciesist," he snorts, shaking his head. "I'm anything but. My best friend's a werewolf, an _alpha_ one at that," he gives a pointed look to Derek's hand that's still touching him. Derek gives him a dry look and removes it. "My best friend's a banshee, her boyfriend was a kanima, is now a werewolf, my ex girlfriend's a werecoyote, and my best friend's girlfriend is a kitsune. I can pretty safely say that's not the case."

"So you'd rather date a human and risk them finding out about the supernatural. Brilliant plan."

"I'd _rather_ date a spark, but there's no spark dating site, so a human was the next bext thing, asshole. Dating werewolves is hard when you know about them, because then they don't have to hide their wolf side."

Derek narrows his eyes. "And that's supposed to sound not speciest because...?"

"You don't get it. Me having an alpha werewolf living with me? They freak out. Get jealous and insecure all the time because they smell him on me. They scent me at every opportunity, which is a nuisance, because then Scott does the exact same thing once I get home, even though he at least _tries_ to be subtle about it, thank you, Scott. They have anger problems, which is ironic. There's almost always a challenge issued to Scott, and guess who has to step in the middle of it? Me. That's right. You know what else? They eat _everything_. Say goodbye to your food, because they'll snatch it right out of your grasps and raid your pantrees without so much as a 'you gonna eat that, bro?'

"And for a week out of the month, this all just gets worse. And not because they have a period, because of the full moon. Or, unless they're a girl, in which case, two weeks out of the month. So yeah, I'm done dating werewolves. Or werecoyotes. Or were anythings. Basically if you sprout fur and get angry, I'm uninterested. Even you're really pretty. By the way, that's your first problem. You're a freaking model, dude, those cheekbones don't come without a price. I have this theory that all models are either werewolf or photoshopped. Scott and I play this game, where we -"

"Okay. Okay, I get it," Derek says, looking defeated and like someone had just run over his Xbox.

"Why do you look so upset? Don't you want to find someone like you? Why would you even come if Jackson said I was human?"

"He didn't say you're human because he doesn't know I'm a werewolf," Derek says. 

Stiles stares disbelievingly. Jackson, that idiot. No way Stiles figured it out first. That's... actually, yeah, that makes a lot of sense. To be fair, Jackson hasn't had much scent training; neither Scott or Jackson has. They've just had to learn for themselves. Which is a bummer, because it could've helped their teenage years so fucking much.

"I... I don't know. I guess this would've been better, since I'd save the whole 'I'm a werewolf' conversation, and risk losing them. Dating betas as an alpha is a bad idea for a lot of reasons, so it was this or another alpha. Which, again, not a good idea for a lot of reasons."

Derek's really startling to look like a kicked puppy and it makes Stiles feels like he's the one that kicked him. Damn it! He had a _rule_ about not dating supernatural. One that the entire packed supported, by the way, since that one time with the evil fairy. He shudders, because fairies should not be dated. Ever. They're scary and obsessive and suprisingly dark and tall, especially when their representation is Tinkerbell. Who would've thought? It seemed perfectly innocently right up until she bound his hands and tossed him in the boot of a car.

Stiles hesitates, chews on his lip for a moment. "Hey, you're a born wolf, right?"

Derek sends him an exasperated look. "How did you know - no. You know what, I don't want to know how you could tell."

Stiles beams. "Great! Would you consider letting me pick your brain? Scott was bitten without his consent as a teenager, and the alpha fled after, so we still have a lot of unanswered questions about the whole lycranthrope thing."

Derek's face softens a little, and he nods. "I...Okay."

"Dude, you're the best. Perhaps we could do this over coffee? At my place? Werewolves hate coffee shops," he grins. 

The corners of Derek's lips quirk, even as he rolls his eyes. "I'd like that."

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr](http://dudeitsbaconhills.tumblr.com/)


End file.
